110-Year-Old Tombstone Stolen: Other Cemetery Residents All Suspects

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Breckenridge Colorado, (elevation 9,600 feet) has been rocked to the bones. According to CBS Denver, a 110 year old grave marker was stolen from a local cemetery. The article repeatedly calls the marker a tombstone… despite the fact that they make a huge deal about it being made of wood. A genealogist discovered the theft of the tombwood while taking a break from working on… nothing. Lucky for us, the genealogist took a bit of time out of her busy schedule of doing… nothing, to tell us a little bit about the “owner” of the tombwood.

Bertha Welch, in all seriousness, seemed like a bit of a tough cookie. She was a 20-year-old single mom in a time when that was a jail-able offense. According to the article, her deadbeat husband abandoned her and her children. She came to Breckenridge to make a new start and was well on her way. Unfortunately she died during childbirth. So once we find this grave marker, we should all pitch in and try to get back child support for this poor woman. We can have the genealogist put down the… nothing she’s working on, and help us track down her progeny so we can pay over the centuries worth of back due child support.

Of course, the genealogist says she hopes the marker is “not really stolen, [she hopes] it’s just missing.” I’m not exactly sure how a grave marker goes “missing” but it scares the shit out of me. I’m sure it was stolen, and I’m sure it will be returned when Bertha Welch’s ghost haunts the shit out of the d-bag who is using it as their coffee table.

(photo: Crow sitting on a gravestone in moonlight from Shutterstock)

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